Thursday, December 4, 2014

Jason's Essay

Happy Wednesday Bloggers!

          Jason had to write an essay this week about someone he is close to, and he chose me. These are some of the sweetest words I've ever read, so I thought I'd share. :) What a beautiful reminder of the blessing I have in my husband!

Essay written by: Jason Hallett

A year ago, my life was a high and drunken mess. I was either passed out or blacked out, trying to kill the pain of my past. I did not truly understand how to regain my footing after being severely injured. My faith was tested, and as a person I had grown weary of life. My wife revived my will. She helped rebuild my interest in my faith and reaffirm my conviction to it. Rachel gave me the support system I needed to quit my meds and slow my drinking...and that is just the beginning. I can never thank God enough for giving me Rachel as my person I get to spend my whole life with. She helped me in my youth when we first dated all the way back in eighth grade, and she still helps me every day now that I am a grown man. Just over a year ago when we moved in together, she started by helping me reaffirm my faith, break my pain-pill addiction and alcohol abuse. Since then, she has helped me get into college, eat healthier, and always keeps my head above the water. God gave me a great woman, who supports me in all I do, and has won my heart in the process.
 My wife has been the biggest factor in me surviving the major hardships of my life. When we dated in eighth grade, she had no idea she saved me then, and now she has no idea she saved me more recently when we re-entered one another’s lives all over again and re-kindled our love for one another. While in eighth grade together, Rachel and I dated; we were crazy about each other. She was not allowed to have a boyfriend and we were separated from one another at the end of the school year. During the time we dated, outside of school, my life was a struggle. At home I was not a kid, I was a parent to my younger brother and I was severely abused, along with many other problems. Rachel was the only part of that period in time where I was happy. Every day I went to school and passed notes with her, my world was good again. When we were separated, our hearts were broken, but I vowed to return five years later as a military man. Sure enough, I returned, but was three years late because of the injuries I sustained in Afghanistan in 2010. When I reached out to Rachel on Facebook my life on the outside seemed ok to many. I had finally finished my two year stay at the hospital, and my outer wounds were “healed.” I was taking courses at a local college, working on getting a home and pursuing stock trading. However, most of the people around me did not see or know that I was hurting inside; even I was trying to avoid the pain. I was constantly high on pain pills, partying, and drinking. I had everything materially, but I was missing the feeling of someone being by my side, a shoulder to lean on when I was weary. God knew I needed Rachel to come into my life, to stabilize me, and renew my faith. Without Rachel’s support and constant uplifting, I would never come as far as I have. Because of her care and love, I am now completely involved in my faith. I am in school full time, off medicines, I only have a couple drinks a month, and my dream of being a portfolio manager is closer than ever.
When Rachel and I re-connected on Facebook last year, I was in California and she was in Colorado. In my heart I knew I needed to reach out to her and fulfil my promise to return. It was by God’s design that she would come back into my life and help me rebuild my very soul. When Rachel flew from Colorado to my little apartment in San Diego, she did more than just visit me- she gave me hope and truth. She saw through my mask of a life and saw that underneath what I had made habits, I was hurting and falling apart. She saw my abundance of medicine and threw them out, knowing I truly did not need them. She then helped me control my drinking and other bad habits. While I was healing from these issues, she motivated me to go to church with her. She not only healed my mind of the destruction of my past. She pulled me out of a dark corner I had shut myself into. She even helped me re-build and strengthen my relationship with God, which is now another great help when I am troubled. The crazy thing is, she did not even mean to do half of what she did. She never once told me to stop drinking, but when I was with her I was comfortable and happy enough not to. She never begged me to go to church, I just wanted to see what was making her glow every time she talked about God. For a million reasons, I will be forever grateful for this woman.
As I’ve explained, my life was very unstable before Rachel. I had no real plan for my future. When she moved in with me in San Diego, she motivated me and gave me the support structure I needed to succeed. Without her, every aspiration I had would have been an uphill battle to capture. Before Rachel moved out to California, my foundation was fractured, and I never felt like I had a home. I had no true support to lean on to reach my goals. No one really took the time to understand my struggles and weaknesses, or helped me overcome them instead of just running from them. Now, Rachel is always there to support me when I’m down. When I have a rough period in the stock market, she reaffirms my capabilities in my goal to manage money for others, and then reminds me that everyone has a bad day sometimes. My wife is also there to celebrate the good days by my side. She knows how to make me feel proud of myself, and how to make me laugh. Ever since our relationship, and now our marriage began, my wife has helped me keep pushing, even during the times I want to quit. I know that without her I would be missing something very important. I would be a ship without a rudder. Because of Rachel, I am a firm believer in a phrase someone once told me, “Behind every great man, is an even greater woman.”
Without my wife, I do not know where I would have ended up. I do know that my faith would be weaker, I would still be trying to kill and drown my pain, and I would not be pursuing my dreams with the drive I am now. Rachel truly has shaped my life in a positive way, has helped me regain my footing, and has helped me conquer the demons of my past. I am forever grateful for the woman she is, and honored to be her other half.


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